Star Wars Episode VIII: Photoshopped Leaks!

Now that Star Wars Episode VIII is done filming in Ireland, Stormtrooper Larry can finally share exclusive intel with our loyal readers!

You see, we actually visited the set and took some upclose and never-before-seen spy shots of Episode VIII in Ceann Sibal and Dunmore Head, Ireland!

The crashed ship

On the first day, we managed to catch the “crashed ship” sequence mentioned by the popular Making Star Wars:

From this angle, the crashed ship appears to have two wings and a propeller. Maybe Kylo is a fan of vintage ships just like Count Dooku.

And if that’s indeed his ship being surrounded by his Knights of Ren, then he’s just as bad a pilot as his father, who also crashed while making Episode VII.

The tiny Ahch-To ship

Next, we saw this mockup of a tiny ship. But while everyone’s attention was focused on the small prop, we discovered something else. Something so big and obvious we’re surprised no one mentioned it until now:

Do you see it? It’s so obvious…… the tiny sheep!

Why is Luke’s planet filled with a bunch of sheep? Could they be native life forms? Maybe they’re Luke’s food source, as well as a convenient source of fluffy Jedi robes.

The Jedi temple

Our next stop: the rumored first Jedi Temple. It seems we were wrong all along:

The first Jedi temple was gaudy, ostentatious and in bad taste. And from the banners on the ramparts, the symbol of the first Jedi order was mouse ears.

We have no idea why they would build their tacky temple on the side of a cliff.

The huge creature

Further down the coast, we managed to sneak a shot of the rumored alien that will figure in the confrontation between Luke, Rey and the Knights of Ren:

It seems to be a new type of creature. At one point, Luke was spotted taking small chunks of its fluffy body and roasting them over a bonfire.

Poor Luke must’ve lost his mind while in exile.

Cast photos

On our last day, we managed to access the set for a few minutes before we were booted out by security. Here’s the only image we got:

That’s Daisy Ridley in full costume. She appears to be talking intently with a new character known only as “Larry”. Rumors say the mysterious character will play her love interest in Episode VIII. Could he be the cameo by Tom Hardy? Whatever the case, we’re sure Larry is a good-looking guy.

Finally, we have this tweet from Director Rian Johnson calling it a wrap:

Johnson sure has a good eye for spotting talent.

PS: During our stay, a local hobo kept hounding us for change and “a ride off-planet”. Here’s his pic in case anyone knows his family:

 

Star Wars Episode VIII: New Photos of the Millennium Falcon (including Interior)!

 

Today, let’s take a break from the regular programming about Rogue One. For our weekend heist, we return to the shrouded mystery that is Star Wars Episode VIII!

This time, we bring you new spy shots of the Millennium Falcon for Episode VIII from the intrepid Bothan spynet of 28 Days Later, a forum for urban explorers. So head on over to check them out!

Here’s analysis of the shots:

• The Daily Mail was wrong: the earlier leaked photos of the Ahch-To set showing the Falcon and the scorched tree are NOT in Pinewood Studios. They were actually taken in Longcross Studios, 25 miles away from Pinewood!

• As expected of a Star Wars film, the Falcon prop is top-notch and amazingly detailed. Everything from the AG-2G quad laser cannons up top to the various cables and greeblies hanging from the landing gear is faithfully reproduced.

• Conversely, there is ship interior as expected. The spy shots are the first to go inside the open ramp of the Falcon (our hats off to BHG for being such a brave Bothan). While there’s enough room inside to stand around, it’s a hollow shell. The Falcon prop will likely be used for framing and walk-around shots, but a different in-studio mockup will be used for the interior scenes.

• There’s an accessible cockpit area, and it’s pointed right at the mysterious Force tree.

• Longcross Studios is actually in Surrey. It is separate from the Pinewood Studios set in Buckinghamshire and consists of five studios, all built on a former Defence Ministry tank facility. Other movies shot there include Skyfall, Guardians of the Galaxy and Thor: The Dark World. 

If there’s anything cooler than seeing the Falcon, it’s knowing that it’s resting on an actual proving ground that used to churn out tanks!

UPDATE: We received permission from the urban exploration site 28 Days Later to link back to the original post. So head on over there before Disney finds out!

Stay tuned tomorrow as we take a closer look at Luke’s tree! Meanwhile, check out Stormtrooper Larry’s faceoff with the notorious Chewbacca Mask Lady!

 

VIDEO: The Running Trooper Challenge!

 Stormtrooper Larry takes part in the running man challenge… to the horror of Star Wars characters!

Don’t forget to subscribe for more Stormtrooper Larry videos!

 

An Analysis of the New Star Wars: Episode VIII Photos!

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It is a period of uncertainty. Rebel drones, striking from a hidden van, have won their first victory against the Disney Empire.

During filming, Rebel spies managed to steal spy shots of the Empire’s new blockbuster, STAR WARS EPISODE VIII,  a movie with enough hype to rake in an entire planet’s GDP.

Pursued by Disney’s security, the drone races back to Stormtrooper Larry, custodian of the spy shots that will thrill Star Wars geeks and ignite excitement across the galaxy…

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Opening shot… it’s the Millennium Falcon! The grimy ship looks clean, and appears to be resting in the same planet it landed at during the ending of The Force Awakens.

“Chewie, stay here and watch the parking meter.”

The planet is the same (Ahch-to, Luke’s planet of exile and rumored home of the first Jedi temple), but the filming location is actually different. The crew had to recreate the island of Skellig Michael from Ireland in the backlot of London’s Pinewood studios. This is due to concerns of the crew’s impact on the UNESCO-protected island, as well as recent rockfalls that made it a hazard to film onsite.

In a zoomed out view, we can see the Jedi steps painstakingly recreated by the crew. The real island featured 618 steps carved out of the stone, which Rey climbed to meet Luke.

One new feature is a gnarly, menacing tree that looks out of place in the verdant green of Ahch-To. Could this be Episode 8’s version of the dark side cave on Dagobah?

“Oh, that tree? That’s where you’ll mock-battle Kylo Ren while I poke rocks around.”

Here’s a closer look at the Tree of the Dark Side:

“Oh and don’t mind the smell. It’s also where I hang my dirty Jedi laundry.”

Or maybe it’s not a gnarled old tree. Luke might have burnt it when he first arrived on the island, which explains this tantalizing scene from The Force Awakens:

A funeral pyre tree for his dead students, then? Either way, that is one creepy-ass tree.

But that’s not all. Higher up the hillside, we see a completely different set… what looks to be the main entrance to a reinforced building, fronting a huge courtyard!

The change is dramatic. While Ahch-to looks natural and rustic, the second set looks modern and grandiose. We’re betting it’s a completely different planet.

Our guess, is it could be either:

• The Resistance base on D’Qar, where a mass evacuation will take place when the First Order strikes back
• The Republic’s interim government, which was relocated to a different planet following the destruction of Hosnian Prime

We also see a bold red stripe, which was characteristic of the old Galactic Republic and the Rebel Alliance.

Those walls sure look thick. In fact, they bring to mind the German artillery emplacements in Normandy during WWII:

But then again, It could just be a majestic entrance, considering those tiny steps and the scale of the walls. Could it be the new Senate building? That courtyard looks royal enough and hearkens back to Naboo.

Finally, we leave you with this shot of an unfinished set.

The upper edges seem to be finished and appear to show an ancient and rundown setting. Could this be the sinister underbelly of the city where Finn and Kelly Marie Tran will have their romantic adventure?

Did these stolen set plans whet your appetite? If you’re hungry for more, then read what COULD be the leaked plot of Star Wars Episode 8!

Disclaimer: No Bothans died to bring you this information.

Could This Be the Entire Plot of Star Wars Episode 8?

Earlier today, our Bothan spies alerted us to a trending topic on the Holonet…. someone has supposedly obtained the script and leaked the entire plot of Star Wars Episode VIII.

This alleged leak not only has the title of Episode VIII, it also features massive plot twists bigger than a Star Destroyer.

If you really want to spoil yourself, read on.

WARNING: Once you cross this line, it will be like the dark side. There will be no going back.

Ready?

Okay, you asked for it.

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Star Wars Episode VIII:

Echoes of the Dark Side

 

• The camera pans down on a green-brown planet, pockmarked and mottled with toxic pollution. It is eclipsed by a looming shadow, either a massive ship or an orbiting base of some kind. A lone shuttle is seen making its way to this immense construct.

• The ship lands. General Hux disembarks, followed by a pair of stormtroopers supporting a wounded Kylo Ren. They are taken to a cavernous room bathed in shadows to see Supreme Leader Snoke. While Snoke grills Hux over the fiasco on Starkiller Base, he has only one line for Kylo, “It is time you complete your training.”

• The camera then turns out the window. Outside, we see a massive battle fleet assembling. Scores of Star Destroyers and other capital ships are converging from all points of First Order territory to strike the final blow against the weakened Republic.

• We pick up on the last scene in The Force Awakens. Luke takes the lightsaber, then hands it back to Rey. It is a symbolic passing of the torch, where Rey becomes the latest force wielder and Luke is the Jedi Master.

• In a flashback, Luke reveals that Snoke was able to seduce Kylo Ren and some of the other students to the dark side. Snoke then ordered them to massacre the entire Jedi academy. Only Luke and a few others survived, including a young Rey who was subsequently dumped on Jakku to hide her from the growing First Order.

• Rey is angry at Luke, not just for abandoning her but because she guesses that he is her father. Luke turns to her and says, “No, you are my father”.

• It turns out that Rey is the reincarnation of Anakin Skywalker, or more specifically “the Chosen One”. Luke found that the spirit of the chosen one is reincarnated by the Force every time the universe is thrown out of balance, which apparently happens on a regular basis.

• Luke learned all these after isolating himself from the galaxy. He searched for the first Jedi temple to understand how it works, and in the process discovered the cyclic history of the Jedi throughout the millenia. The first Jedi temple itself has the same layout as the one on Coruscant, based on these leaked photos of the set being constructed.

• There’s another reason for Luke walking away from the galaxy: seeing the brutal death of his students nearly made him succumb to the dark side, which may have been one of Snoke’s aims. After all, if you want to get rid of the galaxy’s last Jedi, there are other ways to achieve it besides killing them.

• The reported “space casino” scene is actually a flashback from when Luke was running from the First Order and searching for hints of the Jedi homeworld.

• Rey was the product of a virgin birth — Luke says “you are a child of the Force”. This explains how she was able to mind-control the stormtrooper, wield a lightsaber and almost kill Kylo Ren without Jedi training.

• Luke faces an internal struggle whether to train Rey or not. Based on what he learned of the Jedi’s history, the chosen one always struggles between the light and dark side of the Force. He is afraid that Rey could become another Darth Vader and do more damage to the galaxy than Kylo or even Snoke could ever hope to accomplish.

• The ghosts of Yoda, Obi-wan and Anakin appear (hence why Hayden and Frank Oz were spotted filming). This makes Luke change his mind and decide to train Rey.

• In one scene, Rey has a vision of Anakin telling her she is him, in a new life. Then we see a vision of hundreds of other Force ghosts who are heavily implied to be the past chosen ones. Rey also encounters Maz Kanata, although it is unclear if they are actually communicating by telepathy or if this is dream sequence. Maz repeats “The lightsaber chose you.”

• On the other side of the galaxy, Finn is revived from his coma… to wailing sirens and mayhem. He wakes up just in time to witness the First Order strike back on D’Qar. Following the destruction of Starkiller Base, Snoke dispatched a considerable fleet to wreak vengeance on the Resistance base. As he is hustled off one of the last transports from the planet, an exasperated Finn asks, “Why is it that we’re always running from something?” Poe quips “To stay alive, buddy!”

• Onboard a cruiser, Finn and Poe receive their new orders: Accompany General Leia Organa to the Republic’s new seat of government and bolster their plea for war against the First Order. We are then introduced to Laura Dern’s character, a Resistance officer who is distrustful of Finn. Poe staunchly defends his friend, and we see the friction between Poe the intrepid pilot and Laura the straight-rule officer.

• The Republic’s temporary government has relocated to an old city (which is why the crew filmed in Dubrovnik, Croatia). The elegant but sinister city echoes Bespin’s Cloud City in The Empire Strikes Back.

• The Republic is in turmoil, and Lord Vikram (played by Benicio Del Toro) is the interim leader. It is implied that he isn’t the best choice as leader, and only got promoted because he happened to be offworld during the capital’s destruction. There is a memorial service of sorts for all of the victims (which includes much of the Republic leadership) who were killed in the Hosnian system.

• During the ceremony, we also see an honor guard taken from Ralph McQuarrie’s Royal Guards concept from the OT:

• Leia pushes for war while Vikram argues they need more time. The Hosnian system’s annihilation disrupted galactic communications, and they aren’t able to contact the majority of the Republic. Ships have already been dispatched to the rest of the galaxy, and they anxiously await the response of the member worlds.

• Vikram wants to wait for communications to be restored and for an army to be assembled, which will take time. Leia disagrees and wants to take the war to the First Order now while they are still reeling from the destruction of Starkiller Base. Both argue their case before the Senate, or what remains of it.

• Vikram effectively shuts Leia down by telling her she’s letting her personal emotions over Han’s death rule her need for revenge. The Senate is swayed by his argument.

• After the stormy scene, Finn and Poe are tasked by Leia to poke around the city. One of Leia’s contacts says the First Order have spies embedded in the upper reaches of the Republic, and Leia strongly suspects it to be Vikram.

• Leia’s contact turns out to be Chala (played by Kelly Marie Tran). She tags along with the Finn/Poe bro-ship, and Finn quickly warms on to her.

• One of the subplots has Finn and Chala having a flirty adventure in the underbelly of the urban planet. This develops the relationship between the two, and it’s probably where the that alien horse in the Dubrovnik filming fits in.

• Afterwards, Poe, Finn and Chala corner an aide of Vikram, who has evidence of contact between Vikram and the First Order.

• Leia and the Resistance confront Vikram. Vikram denies everything, and Leia orders him jailed for treason. The Republic leadership is stunned — Leia has effectively carried out a coup. She orders the system to prepare for war.

• Poe suits up for battle, while Finn is put in charge of planetary defense due to his knowledge of First Order offensive doctrine. He is also entrusted with the shield codes.

• Before the impending battle, Finn and Chala have a tender moment alone. Finn wonders why Vikram didn’t just lower the shields for the First Order, since he was the Republic’s temporary leader. They walk into a room and suddenly we see Captain Phasma! Chala then pulls a gun on Finn, subdues him and takes the shield codes.

• It was Chala who was the First Order spy all along. She planted the evidence incriminating Vikram, and used Finn to get the codes. To add insult to injury, Chala tells him what she really think of Finn: that’s he’s a sickening traitor. And if that wasn’t bad enough, Captain Phasma steps in to ruin Finn’s day even more. She returns Finn’s favor from TFA and makes him lower the shields.

• The shield is deactivated just as a massive First Order fleet jumps out of hyperspace. Laura takes the opportunity to swipe at Finn’s distrustful character, while Poe says Finn wouldn’t have done it unless he was under duress. Their exchange is cut short as the orbital bombardment begins. Poe runs with the other pilots to their ships.

• The entire planet is thrown into chaos — it is a full-scale invasion. The Republic only has a token fleet to defend the planet, since most of the armada was wiped out on Hosnian Prime. Meanwhile, the First Order brought along its entire weight. While the capital ships slug it out, a motley assortment of starfighters led by Poe defend the planet and the ensuing evacuation. This is where the X-wing and the modified A-wing from Pinewood studios come in.

• In a montage of brutal battles in space, over the city and on the ground, the Republic defenders struggle against the full might of the First Order. Kylo Ren lands on the city and goes to Vikram’s holding cell. Kylo asks him for Leia’s location, and Vikram replies saying that while he hates Leia, he respects her and cannot believe she sired a monster like Kylo Ren. Kylo decapitates him in response.

• While all hell breaks loose, Finn tries to escape from Captain Phasma and Chala. In the ensuing chase scene, Phasma taunts Finn, calling FN-2187 a traitor to the First Order and a disgrace to the Resistance. He replies “My name is FINN!” and lunges at Phasma. However, he is no match for her. Phasma knocks him out just as First Order troopers arrive, and Finn is taken into custody.

• What is left of the Republic and the Resistance crumble under the assault and flee the planet. Leia is able to escape, however she ends up gravely wounded. Command of the Resistance then falls to Laura Dern. The remainder of the fleet, a ragtag group of battle-worn cruisers, scorched corvettes and snubfighters, retreat from the battle and jump to hyperspace.

• In the aftermath, Laura tells the assembled fighters that they are effectively the last of the Resistance. She then butts heads with Poe on their course of action, which leads to a tense standoff. Laura wants to hunker down and consolidate forces for the long term. Poe wishes to rescue Finn and take the fight to the First Order, as Leia had intended.

• Having failed to capture Leia and draw Luke out of hiding, Snoke falls on a backup plan. Finn is taken before Kylo Ren, who starts to torture him knowing that it will be felt by Rey.

• Across the galaxy, Rey feels Finn’s distress. Just like ESB, she says she needs to go and rescue her friend. Luke had also felt Leia’s peril through the Force. He tells Rey she isn’t ready yet, and how he abandoned his training with Yoda and rushed into a trap to save his own friends.

• Luke then says he isn’t Yoda, and he has his own way of doing things. Instead of remaining behind, he goes along with Rey to help.

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Spoilers end

Holy nerf herder! We’re still reeling from the (possible) revelation that Rey is Anakin reincarnate! And even if all these isn’t true, that (possible) ending is enough to make us excited for Episode IX!

What do you think of this (supposed) leak? Does it really “echo with the Force”, or is it as hollow as a Gamorrean’s brain? I guess we won’t find out until December 2017!

If you can’t wait until then for more Star Wars action, then read this short story why FN-2187, Finn, has a conscience.